Archie's World and Welcome To It

A couple years ago, I covered this Spire comic which told the comic version of Revelations.  If that wasn't enough to frighten you into the straight and narrow, Spire Comics is back once again with this 1976 issue.  Yes, it's "Archie's World", and frankly, I'm a little frightened to visit. But let's go anyway.

First of all, 59 cents? Really Spire comics? This was 1976 when other mainstream comics were 30 or 35 cents. You want me to pay a 40% premium for you to preach to me?

In case you don't know (and didn't go back and read my previous post), Al Hartley was a former Archie and Marvel comic book artist who turned away from mainstream comics after becoming a born again Christian.  He licensed the rights to the Archie characters to use as a vehicle to spread his (or His rather) message.

Fantastic news! The world doesn't revolve just around Riverdale!

What the hey is going on in panel 3?

I wish I could tell you that Jughead fought the good fight, and the Sisters let him be. I wish I could tell you that - but Archie's World is no fairy-tale world.

"I thought missionaries went to jungles"...and looked like fat, old white guys in pith helmets.

Jughead's reaction here, leaping and throwing a perfectly good pizza away, is clearly too much to be caused by something so mundane as Moose's comment. He's obviously suffering PTSD from page 2.

That's right, Jug. The natives may have accepted the word of God, but they're still a bunch of ignorant savages.

"We missionaries don't bring America with us...We bring Christ"...and tuberculosis.

"It's not enough to give your Heart, you have to give your stomach too!" Surprise, Jughead, you've been lured into a cannibalistic feast, and you're the main course.

Yeah, you might want to start this race a little further into the water, gang.

Knowing all animals, be it land or sea, are frightened by "Gingers", Archie leaps into action.

Word of advice, Veronica: Never get in the van of a man with a '70's 'stache.

It's funny, because Big Ethel is going to be sold on the black market.

Two families in every room? Sleeping in shifts? Crazy Chinamen.

Tell me about Jesus...because you're about to meet him.

Jughead and the gang are so busy patting themselves on the back about what good Christians they are, they completely forget about the poor guy who asked them for guidance.  He isn't seen again after that forlorn look in panel 4. I presume he was recaptured by the Communists.